A Debrief: WWE Superstars Report for 10/01/09

Alright lads?  And the occasional lady as well, I guess.  It’s Superstars time, bet you’re excited

I’m going to leave any real ranting for the end, or possibly throw it in during a match, depends how they’re going.  We start off with...

Smackdown Contribution:  Shad (w/ JTG and Eve) vs. Tyson Kidd (w/ DH Smith and Natalya)

I know Cryme Tyme vs. The Hart Dynasty’s been done to death, but I’m surprised they’ve gone for this one.  They’ve put the smaller heel (Kidd’s 199 pounds) against the bigger face.  Normally they’re more of a fan of the face underdog.  Todd decides to promote as much of what’s happened/is happening in the WWE as he can in 10 seconds – Al Sharpton, Decade of Smackdown, Hell in a Cell.  JR tells us this is another chapter in the feud... we’ve noticed, they’ve been doing this for months!

Tyson starts out getting a kick in and then going to the ropes to stop Shad from getting any offence in, rinse and repeat a few times.  Shad lifts Tyson from being in a headlock and throws him forward, Kidd manages to use the momentum to continue into the ropes, but a big shoulder block takes him down.  Shad, playing the power game, launches Kidd hip toss-style from one turnbuckle to the other and follows up with a big stinger splash, despite the warnings of DH Smith.  Flapjack for 2.  Shad pumps up the crowd effectively, but gets taken out at the knee going for another splash into the corner.  Cue work on the leg, but Shad tosses Kidd out of the ring and goes to join him on the outside.  A snake-eyes type move onto the apron is followed by a missed big boot into the ringpost.  Now cue work on the leg... several stomps and an innovative cloverleaf-like move around the ringpost.  The guys on the outside clash briefly as the ads roll on in.

Kidd’s got a leglock on Shad as we come back, and continues to work on it until Shad gets a boot behind him to push him over the top rope allowing some recovery time.  Tyson gets back in and hits another dropkick to the knee, then lands on his feet as Shad lifts him over his head and delivers a spinning back kick.  Those kicks have always impressed me, they’re almost Tajiri-like. Shad takes Kidd down with a big clothesline and USA chants start up, more clotheslines and a back body drop, followed by a back-suplex-facebuster for 2 (rope break).  Kidd gets a kick in, then gets back tossed onto the apron, landing on his feet.  He goes for a springboard... but gets caught – Thugnificent.  Shad picks up the win.

Winner:  Shad 

Rating: 5.6/10 – Pretty good stuff with the unusual dynamic, Kidd impressed me.  Shad was looking a lot more aggressive than usual, but that detracted from the spectacle.  He’s a better entertainer when he looks like he’s having fun.  In this match, except for one or two moments, he could easily have been the heel.

Ask the Divas – Beth Phoenix has learned not to mix business with pleasure.  One word. Santino.  Other than that, inane drivel, but that was a winner right there.

ECW Contribution:  Sheamus vs. Tyler Reks

Tyler Reks, you’re done I’m afraid.  Relegated to ECW’s face jobber.  Sheamus has really impressed me since his arrival, and his feud with Shelton Benjamin can only help him. Incidentally, Burchill couldn’t beat Shelton after he’d already been destroyed by Sheamus on ECW.  That means he’s either got to beat Tyler Reks on ECW next week, or he’ll be completely buried by The Hurricane.  I like Burchill, so I’m hoping they give him that win next week to keep him up and running.

Tyler gets the best of the opening exchange, causing Sheamus to recuperate on the outside. Sheamus gets on top quickly, and dodges the corner leapfrog and hits a kick to the midsection, following up with a flurry of rights to the grounded Tyler Reks.  Gutbuster for 2.  Sheamus locks in a modified abdominal stretch that gives him license to keep getting some punches in while the submission’s in place.  I like the submission background he seems to have, he seems to be very used to switching between submissions when opportunities present themselves.  Reks does fight back though, hits the faceplant, and tries to get the crowd going.  Fails miserably.  Hits a pretty big elbow drop for 2, then out of nowhere Sheamus hits the pump (bicycle) kick and picks up the win.

Winner:  Sheamus

Rating: 4/10 – Not hugely impressive really, Reks got nothing going in a fairly even looking match.  Sheamus wasn’t bad but didn’t really show anything special, although using something other than the Irish Curse as a finisher can only mean a bigger push.  I’m looking forward to his feud with Shelton though, if he had the charisma to match his athletic ability he’d be a top guy by now.

Huge Orton promo

Huge Orton-Cena rivalry promo

Hell in a Cell – my picks are Legacy, Cena, Punk, Kofi, JeriShow, Alicia Fox, Ziggler

RAW Contribution: The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi Kingston, from Ghana, West Africa.  So... Not Jamaica then?  Does this mean he’s giving up on the Jafaican accent?  Shame...  Ah, Cole tells us his career’s been shaped by the Jamaican lifestyle.  What?  Plothole, you say?

Kofi starts out on top, hitting a snapmare and a second rope clothesline early.  We’re reminded that Kofi’s won a lot of matches where the odds are against him, and it’s true, he’s won 6-man matches, 4-ways... Miz is now on top, and hits the Gail Kim-like clothesline into the turnbuckle, where his body goes through the ropes.  Unfortunately, he doesn’t follow it up with some more high flying usually... and in this case he shouldn’t have tried.  Going for an axe handle from the top, he gets caught with a punch to the stomach and flips on landing.  I’ve never really understood that, other than to make it look good.  Headlocks by Kingston for a minute or so, then a quick set of shoulders and a kick sends Miz to the outside, who backs away when Kingston looks to vault to the outside.  It’s ads time.

Kingston’s on top and on a roll as we return, but Miz puts a stop to it, with a kind of leg-breaker. Time for Miz to heel it up, and goes to work on the leg for about a minute and a half, until Kingston manages to flip him over the top rope with his good leg (like Shad did earlier).  Miz gets back to work on the leg after reversing an attempt by Kingston to suplex him into the ring, and hits a running knee for 2.  Kofi gets a bit more momentum, but is selling the leg injury, and Miz chop blocks him down and gets a half crab in.  Miz rushes Kofi, misses, bounces off the ropes and gets wiped out by Trouble in Paradise.

Post match, Swagger comes out, boot to Kofi, gutwrench powerbomb to Miz.

Winner:  Kofi Kingston

Rating: 6/10 – Good build up to the triple threat at HIAC.  I think I’d actually be happy to see any of those guys win the title, and any of them could.  I’ve gone for Kofi as my pick simply because I like what he does, and he looked very good at Money in the Bank this year.  Swagger and Miz would both be credible opponents, and it’s probably a good thing they’ve dropped Carlito from this picture, evil goatee and all.  I can’t really see any other faces going for the US title if Kofi drops it, which is the only real reason I can see for him retaining.

Show rating: 5.2/10

Just a quick run-down of my favourite bits from the last week, in no particular order

1)      Finally!  Chavo might be on a face turn!  He punched the guy who had the midget in the full nelson.  How chivalrous!  It’d be good to see him doing something other than be humiliated though

2)      That Trouble in Paradise was pretty sweet

3)      Shelton’s Pay Dirt from absolutely nowhere against Burchill on ECW

4)      The entire segment on ECW with Christian’s pep talk.  Brilliant.

Couldn’t think of a 5, but I’ve not seen Smackdown, I’m sure there’s something on there.  If I think of one, I’ll put it in the comments.  Leave your comments anyway, good or bad.  If you want to call me the saviour of humanity, go for it.  If you want to call me the devil incarnate, then that’s a bit weird, but entirely within your rights.

I’d like to see some of the new talent the WWE has, particularly the ROH guys, come in on ECW.  It’s just so lacking in top-level talent, but it does have a lot of potential.  Yoshi, Sheamus, Shelton, Ryder... they’ve all got the potential to do well.  And PLEASE give Goldust the title at some point, he deserves it.

I’ve been The General, consider yourself debriefed.

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