Well it’s a couple of days from Bragging Rights.  I’m sure I’ve already mentioned how much I’m looking forward to one match on the card, and that’s The Miz vs. John Morrison.  I don’t think there were many people who thought Miz would look even vaguely competent as a singles competitor, but a combination of in-ring ability (that wasn’t always obvious during his time in the greatest tag team of the twenty-first century *stereo lookoff*) and a lot of natural charisma have put him right up there as one of the likely future stars of the business.  Morrison has been stunning us consistently with how good some of his matches have been, particularly against Rey Mysterio and Jeff Hardy.  He’s so popular that the WWE don’t seem to want him to drop the title to Ziggler, and I don’t see why they would.  Morrison’s on the cusp of being able to fight the top guys, but he’s at least 5^th in the pecking order at the moment.  It’s a shame, since he’s probably the most naturally talented of the lot of them, with CM Punk still failing to really make the grade as a top guy on Smackdown.

Anyway, to start us off tonight we have a video package for the late Captain Lou Albano, one of the greatest managers in WWE history.  He managed the likes of The Wild Samoans, Andre the Giant, Pat Patterson, Superfly Jimmy Snuka, hell, even Hulk Hogan.  A great career.

RAW Contribution:  Gail Kim vs. Kelly Kelly

I’m rarely ever impressed by a Diva’s match, but Gail Kim tends to be one of those who can do it.  Really loud Kelly chant going early on.  It’ll be these two and Melina facing Beth, Natalya and Michelle McCool at Bragging Rights in the bathroom break match.  If anyone cares who wins that match, seriously, please comment.  I’d like to hear why.

Decent little spell of mat wrestling, and an excellent series with a backflip into an armdrag by Kelly to reverse a standing armlock, then a quick roll through the ropes by Gail Kim to avoid a turnbuckle splash, into a rolling schoolboy for 2.  Everything was kinda mediocre from there.  Gail Kim may or may not have completely screwed up a frankensteiner, either way she landed hard... so either it was a very good sell or a very big mistake.  Victory roll for 2, and a double clothesline knocks both down.  Gail Kim misses a springboard crossbody and Kelly hits the Kelly Killer – the leg drop where she stands on the opponent’s back first, and picks up the win.

Winner:  Kelly Kelly

Rating: 4/10 – Not bad for a Diva’s match, a couple of good little sequences in there, but it’s really nothing compared to the kind of stuff Trish or Victoria were capable of.  And pushing Kelly Kelly over Gail Kim, the most talented diva on Raw at the moment (I think Beth may be the best in the WWE, but that’s open to debate), well it doesn’t make a great deal of sense to me, other than Vince is a horny teenager in an old man’s body.  Incidentally, the replay looks like Gail Kim didn’t botch.

Undertaker-Smackdown Bragging Rights promo

Did you know, more male teens watched Superstars last week than the Baseball playoffs?  Baseball must really suck.

Cena-Orton Bragging Rights promo

Wrestlemania promo (same one as last week).  Is there any more wrestling on this show?

ECW Contribution:  Kozlov and Zeke vs. Tommy Dreamer and Goldust

Nothing interesting happened.  Mostly Zeke wearing down Tommy, with the occasional bit of referee distraction.  Hot tag to Goldust, the low slap to the face, bulldog, Dreamer breaks up an Iron Curtain while Zeke distracts the referee and Goldust hits the flatliner for the win.

Kozlov hits the Iron Curtain on both and celebrates

Winner:  Vladimir Kozlov

Rating: 1/10 – It gets one mark for Goldust being in it.  Way too short, nothing happened, and virtually no Goldust.

Miz promo

Smackdown Contribution: Eric Escobar and Drew McIntyre vs. R-Truth and Matt Hardy

R-Truth and Matt Hardy out to Hardy’s music.  R-Truth’s would take too long I guess, you couldn’t fit all the promos in as well... This is honestly going to be a real struggle to hit the word count.

Escobar’s out with *sigh* Vickie Guerrero.  Well, I guess he’s a heel then.  I’ve not seen enough of McIntyre or Escobar to really convince me either are going to be good.  This had better impress me, because so far Superstars has been awful.  I would have turned it off if I wasn’t writing the report, honestly.

McIntyre tags Escobar in to face R-Truth before the match even starts.  Escobar gets psyched, but hits a big shoulder block.  R-Truth responds with a big hiptoss and a running headscissors, both well executed.  He gets his cartwheel-splits-calf kick in, which always looks flashy.  Matt Hardy gets tagged in, to a huge pop, but loses momentum quickly and Escobar tags in McIntyre.  Hardy gets back into it, runs McIntyre into the corner and tags in Truth, allowing a double-team hiptoss and a double clothesline to the outside.  Stereo dropkicks to McIntyre and Escobar on the outside, good bit of chemistry from the faces.  Ads time.

Bragging rights promo.  That’s like the 15^th of the night.  How’s the new SD v Raw by the way?  Anyone played it yet?

Back in the ring, Truth hits a drop toe hold on Escobar, but he gets back into it with a distraction from McIntyre, with a falling arm breaker.  McIntyre’s in, with some stiff strikes in the corner and an arm wringer flip.  Starting to work on the arm a bit now, with a stomp and a submission.  *yawn*  Didn’t last long at least, hard mat slam and Escobar’s back in.  Hammerlock.  Truth reverses eventually into a jawbreaker, tries for a sunset flip but Escobar reverses into an elbow drop to the arm.  More submissions and McIntyre’s back in.

Looking at the clock, 4 mins to go, not too bad.  McIntyre still working the arm submission.  Tempted to turn the sound off as King and Cole (taking over from the usual smackdown team) are talking about Escobar and Vickie playing spin the bottle.  No thanks to that image in my head, but I’ve got to listen to it, so I thought I’d spread the joy.  Thank me later.

Truth eventually hits a victory-roll-like reversal to an arm drag for 2, to cause some separation, and a double clothesline sets us up for the hot tag for Matt Hardy, who’s been chanted for all match.  Clotheslines, and a huge bulldog from the corner for 2.  McIntyre elbows his way out of a side effect, but gets caught with an elbow in the corner.  Second rope double axe-handle from Hardy, then a top rope moonsault!  Something I’ve not seen from... well... anyone, for a long time.  There aren’t any high flying finishers any more, but that was a nicely executed one.   Escobar breaks it up at 2 though, and R-Truth takes him to the outside, but misses hard with a vaulting body press.  Escobar gets back into the ring, to be caught by a right from Hardy.  McIntyre looks to take advantage, but Hardy gets a rollup for another 2.  Vickie distracts the referee, Escobar hangs Hardy up on the top rope and McIntyre hits the double underhook DDT for the win.

Winner:  McIntyre and Escobar

Rating: 6/10 – Good stuff from Hardy, who’s looking like he’s well on the way to getting back to ring fitness after a shaky couple of weeks since he got back, in my opinion.  Escobar and McIntyre still haven’t shown me that they’ve got any moves.  Escobar’s going into a PPV without a finisher, effectively (or at least he is at this point...) and McIntyre’s still not done a great deal to impress me.  I really hope they do, at some point, the WWE’s crying out for some fresh talent to make it big, and these two have clearly been given huge pushes early.

Show rating: 3/10 – Decent main event but apart from that... not really worth it

My main point this week is this... ECW, sort yourself out!  There’s plenty of good competition and competitors in there.  No real main eventers, and I include Christian in that.  He’s good, but he’s IC/US/Tag team champion material at best.  Yoshi’s the number 1 contender, which is great, he deserves a push because he’s exciting and gets the crowd going.  Ryder’s been impressive, Goldust’s been awesome, Sheamus is a great prospect.  The problem lies in Kozlov and Jackson.  Two guys without a shred of charisma between them, and they’re getting pushed as henchmen to someone who can’t beat Christian.  If you’re going to have a team like that, they need the title.  Regal needs the title.  Otherwise, why would Kozlov and Jackson be sticking around?  They’ve got nothing to fight for.

The best thing that could happen for ECW right now is for the tag titles to be situated right there, in the hands of Kozlov and Jackson.  I know, it sounds ridiculous, but not so long ago Vladimir Kozlov was one of the top contenders on RAW and Ezekiel Jackson is effectively a carbon copy with bigger arms.  The tag titles would give ECW some more exposure (which it needs) and would allow some of the number one contenders for the titles onto the show, as well as giving the Ruthless Roundtable some license to roam across the other shows (including Regal).  Finally, it would give ECW some credibility, which is something it’s seriously lacking at the moment.

I’ve been The General, consider yourself debriefed.