Chaos Awards Vol 23

Greetings One and Everyone!

Hello Ladies, Gentleman and wrestling fans! I am The Nemesis here with another installment of the Chaos Awards!

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to see TNA this week due to my stream giving out. But rest assured I will be making to making a mockery of TNA and their Creative Team next week!

Let’s get this party started!

Onto Business!
 
Best Match – Chris Jericho vs. Goldust
There is something said for this match, especially when the World Champion goes on twitter and says that a ring veteran such as Goldust is in the best shape of his life and praised him on their match on Superstars.
I believe that this is a first for me. Actually commenting on a show on Superstars as the Best Match of the week. But this really deserves it.
Goldust vs. Jericho was a brilliant match and I honestly believe that from that match, Goldust might just get a tiny push in the direction of a championship.
At least I hope he does. It was a fantastic match. The best match on Superstars so far.

Worst Match – Ezekiel Jackson vs. Jimmy Wang Yang (Smackdown)
Wow. Thank you so much WWE.
Just proved to me exactly why every single Cruiserweight from the last 7 years is jumping ship to TNA. Because if they don’t, they automatically become the jobbers of this generation… which is crap in my opinion. If you bring back the Cruiserweight Championship, the credibility of the WWE goes up by several notches!
Yes, Ezekiel Jackson is big. Yes, Ezekiel Jackson is strong and yes, Ezekiel Jackson is a dominating force… BUT if you are going to put him in the ring with someone that can actually give him a run for his money but still make it look like they are jobbing to him… The perfect candidate for Ezekiel Jackson. Festus. Speaking of which…
WHERE IS FESTUS?!?

Best Performer – Edge
I don’t think Edge can get any higher than what he is right now.
Although they are pushing Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker more, Edge vs. Jericho is going to tear the roof off of Wrestlemania. I truly believe that.
Edge is getting the huge push and he’s a face. I never thought I’d see the words Edge, push and face in the same sentence without seeing Cena or Undertaker in that same sentence.
Edge is really at the pinnacle of his career. Although he is a 9 time World Champion, I don’t think he could be best suited anywhere else than being a WWE performer. He’s charisma is only equaled by his on screen ego and I really respect and admire Edge for what he’s gone through.

Worst Performer – Jack Swagger
Jack has to have done something to be in a “rivalry” with Santino. The All-American-American-American-American-American-American-American-American must be glad that he is going to Wrestlemania and NOT wrestling Santino Marella.
Still, I don’t know what he is doing in Money in the Bank. This time last year, he was ECW Champion and looking to extend his record after beating Finlay at No Way Out. Then, he was cut from a Wrestlemania match because McMahon didn’t like his in ring work.
Now, I’m surprised that he’s actually at Wrestlemania this year. If he wins Money in the Bank I WILL be surprised and applaud the WWE for doing something different. Not saying that it is the right thing, but it will be different and it will be what I want to see.

Best Moment – Cena vs. Batista Confrontation
He’s 6’5” and 310 pounds. At first, I had no reason to like the security. But then the promo started and it became a classic.
If I saw Batista down the street in a really pissed off mood, I’d make sure that I got out of there really quickly to be at least 20 miles away before he took one step towards me. If Batista had security and he’s pissed off, I’d be scared to be the security guards!
The rest of the promo was sweet! Classic Face Cena and classic Heel Batista, this is what promos should be like in wrestling.
This promo with Batista and Cena has now made me want to see this match at Wrestlemania. I finally have a reason apart from the rematch from Summerslam 2008.
Thank heavens for the Creative Team (if it was them) for FINALLY doing something right!

Worst Moment – Cheech and Chong
Two men… who are famous for smoking cannabis… on a PG RATED PROGRAM… having “effects” of being high.
Well *edited* done creative team.
A PG rated show with guys talking about “magic cheerios” while introducing the divas… Sorry. You just completely threw up on the PG rating. Although you did do one thing right. You made me make up my decision. I will NEVER EVER end up like those two. Ever.
Lucky Charms reference with Hornswoggle… DO NOT GET ME STARTED ON THAT!
Why does the WWE INSIST that any of the last few guest hosts have ANYTHING to do with wrestling? Someone please answer me that because I would really like to know.
Seth Green – fantastic. Shaq – fantastic. What about the rest?
Make Shane McMahon GM and get it over with!

Questions: What will WWE have to do to restore it’s credibility to the fans?
What does the WWE have to do to bring back the fans that they have lost in the last few years?
Almost the same question, but I’ve got these in two questions into one.
Here is the list I have come up with:
- Restore the Cruiserweight Championship
- Get rid of the PG rating
- Fire The Great Khali
- Fire Santino Marella if he doesn’t have a match or a gimmick change in the next 6 months
- Fire Hornswoggle
- Make at least 4 new main event stars in the next 8 months
- Bring back blood (somewhat)
- Get rid of the gimmick PPVs
- Restore the Hardcore Championship
- Create more Tag Teams
- Split the Tag Team Championships
- Bring back the kick ass music for PPV events (I don’t mean Skillet. I mean Godsmack, Saliva… they got it right with Fozzy for once)
- Scrap the guest hosts and get a GM
OR
- Get guest hosts who actually KNOW wrestling and are passionate about the wrestling business
- Induct The Rock into the Hall of Fame
- Induct Chris Benoit into the Hall of Fame
- Mention the passing of the superstars who worked with the WWE at any one point in time (They remembered Jack Brisco who never worked for the WWE yet they didn’t remember Eddie “Umaga” Fatu)

Do these things and maybe the WWE will get their old fans back. The fans that they have lost in the last few years might actually enjoy the wrestling product slightly more.

Chaotic Top 20
After a pathetic week in the voting department *evil stare to everyone*…
Angle’s lead has been cut by a small amount.
Beth is back in the top 20 after a strong week and Mr. Anderson climbs within reach the top 10.

**Mr. Anderson is ahead of Triple H from a count back

Vanilla Coke Championship Wrestling!
VCCW Presents Vanilla’d to Death!
Grape Soda and Orange Cordial do battle to see who will be selected for the next generation of VCCW stars.
The Grudge match on the century comes to an end this Sunday! Diet Coke vs. Coke Zero inside a Glass bottle dome! A battle for the ages that cannot be missed!
And in the Main Event…The Nemesis defends his VCCW World Championship against the Evil Unstoppable Monster himself Diet Pepsi!
VCCW Presents Vanilla’d to Death – Live on PPV!
Contact your local satellite broadcaster to be laughed at.

The Bottle Won't Open Rant
John Morrison and R-Truth are the #1 contenders for the Unified WWE Tag Team Championships at Wrestlemania.
I am okay with this, but the thing that annoys me is that they beat two tag teams that have been together for more than a year to earn that spot.
Cryme Tyme and Hart Dynasty are still there you know. I would still like to have see The Miz and Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme or The Miz and Big Show vs. Hart Dynasty at Wrestlemania.
If you are going to have TAG TEAM champions… please put the tag team belts on a tag team that is a CREDIBLE tag team.
I can’t go to TNA this time because of Hernandez and Morgan… but look at the number of tag teams that you have in TNA that have been together for longer than 6 months.
Beer Money Inc., Motor City Machine Guns, Lethal Consequences, British Invasion, The Beautiful People, The Nasty Boys, Team 3D. If I’ve missed any team I apologize, but that is what I came up with on the top of my head. Now name those from the WWE…
Hart Dynasty, Legacy, Cryme Tyme, Bella Twins, MVP & Mark Henry… Are there any others? DX isn’t a tag team anymore. I think that is everyone who has been together for more than 6 months.
So if you are going to put the titles on a tag team, make it a tag team who knows each other and is a credible tag team. Yes TNA has done it before… but it’s worked before. In the WWE, they are throwing top guys together because “they haven’t got anything else for them… so we might as well put them in a tag team.”
Yet again… Creative Team. Pathetic.

Thus concludes another fine episode of the Chaos Awards.
I hope you can all tune in next week!

I’m The Nemesis, you've been a reader.

Comments

1. Comment #1

   It'd be real sad if they threw the Eugene gimmick on that teeny little leprechaun.

   Posted by T. Nutty on Wednesday, March 17, 2010

2. Comment #2

   I agree with practically everything you just said there.
   
   Although you know they'll never induct Benoit.

   Posted by Oliver Andrew Black on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

3. Comment #3

   I don't even WATCH WWE (well, I did watch the AmDrag/Jericho match, but that's it) and I know that Festus is now Drew Gallows and is aligned with CM Punk.
   
   What's your excuse?
   
   Also, upgrading Skillet to Godsmack is like going from feces to urine. An improvement maybe, but not much of one.

   Posted by October Raven on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

4. Comment #4

   @ October Raven
   
   If you don't watch WWE, how do you know so much and decide to comment on my WWE related article?
   
   This article IS my excuse. Because I have the creative freedom to shove my opinion down everyone's throat and they just have to sit there and like it.
   
   DUH?! Of course I don't have an excuse. I can't watch Raw on Monday's or TNA on thursdays (soon to be monday's) here because I'm over the other side of the world. I have to live stream Monday Night Raw and soon TNA Impact because of where I live.
   
   Upgrading? Who said I was upgrading? The music that they USED to have for their PPVs. I made Godsmack as an example cause I just finished watching Summerslam 2006. Bring back Drowning Pool, Mudvayne, Metallica... the bands that can actually have a song that can have the sound and lyrics needed for a rivalry

   Posted by The Nemesis on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

5. Comment #5

   oh please... note my sarcasm...

   Posted by The Nemesis on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

6. Comment #6

   I personally HATE the WM26 theme song. It's ridiculous!
   Wrestling show and pop songs do no mix.
   
   Hornswoggle is somewhat annoying. How could they think it's funny.

   Posted by 1221 on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

7. Comment #7

   Festus is now LUKE Gallows, not Drew. Get your facts straight.
   Some theme songs for PPV's are good, but this is

   Posted by The Destructornator on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

8. Comment #8

   Weird...sentence didnt finish
   
   Anyways next weeks RAW looks good
   
   Contract signing between Bret Hart and Vince, with STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN!!!

   Posted by The Destructornator on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

9. Comment #9

   I agree get rid of gimmick ppv like elmination chamber and ladder match. Wheres no way out? Tabbo Tuesday? Summerslam comeon! Also get rid of PG rating i want it more like TNA Guest host sucks lol. I want someone like Vince or Teddy 2 be gm of raw!!

   Posted by Herakles Azika on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

10. Comment #10

    Yes, Festus was made into Luke Gallows. WWE put up something for Umaga win he died on the WWE site, but never ran a promo or anything. You didn't miss anything with TNA.... It seems their making the Tag Championship the stepping stone to a World Championship. Expect HHH to be back in the title picture after the next PPV (whatever it'll be called). They've now guarenteed Cena's going to win after all the obsticles he has to face... which means the only way for this to go down is that he wins.... RAW needs a GM. The guest hosts would be good if it's people who aren't just promoting their new shows.
    
    Oops...I ranted...sorry.
    
    Here's a question for you to answer; Is the TNA move to Monday night smart, or the worse thing TNA could have done?
    
    My answer; worse. What's you opinion?

    Posted by Laz Langston on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

11. Comment #11

    I don't think they should fire the great khali just give him a good gimmick and give him a push i think he'd be great

    Posted by someone on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

12. Comment #12

    When they take away the PG Rating they will
    Induct Chris Benoit into the Hall of Fame..
    Cruiserweight Title...
    
    When they do these 2 things WWE will START to get better...
    P.S Chris Benoit really deserves it..
    P.P.S If cruiserweights title isn't brought back soon Rey will probably retire or join TNA..

    Posted by .. on Wednesday, March 10, 2010

13. Comment #13

    Nemesis, I am with you in your opinions, but I don't see the PG banner being lifted anytime soon. I live in Connecticut, and Linda McMahon is running for Sen. Chris Dodd's (D) senate seat. As well, she's on the board of Edge-uctaion for the state.I don't see WWE lifting the PG until she loses political power or stops running for it.
    
    I see your list and raise you by these queries:
    -Matt Hardy gets a push & his old pants back
    -Chris Jericho goes for the I-C & gets his old pants back
    -The Creative Team looks at this website and makes WWE better

    Posted by Kuvey A on Thursday, March 11, 2010

14. Comment #14

    FESTUS = Luke Gallows

    Posted by CM Junk on Thursday, March 11, 2010

15. Comment #15

    Nemesis, good article. Here are my views:
    -Cruiserweight Championship? The only reason why I wouldn't wanna see it come back is because the US and IC titles are being unappreciated and slowly going to hell as we speak. So I highly doubt the E will bring it back because to them, making small guys into jobbers WILL be the only way to build up their next so-called "Stars".
    -The PG rating? Like Kuvey A said, as long as Linda Mcmahon is pursuing politics, expect it to be a permanent thing. It's basically a political security blanket just in case she is scrutinized for her involvement in WWE. With a PG rating, it will be very easy for Linda to claim that WWE has made strides of making wrestling family friendly. Which opens the possibility of getting the support from family orientated families.
    -Fire Khali? About 3-4yrs late on that.
    -Fire Santino? Disagree. His comedic rants week after week is one of VBERY FEW reasons I still watch RAW.
    -Fire Hornswoggle? Yes.
    -4 main eventers? John Morrison, Christain, ??? Can't name 4 credible main eventers.
    -Bring Back Blood? In very small amounts please
    -Gimmick PPV's blow. If that was WWE's new plan in order to rival UFC PPV revenue then that was a stupid mistake. A BIG STUPID ONE.
    -Hardcore Championship? Won't come back if WWE is PG. Screw it, bring it back with 24/7 rule! Crash Holly Rocks!! R.I.P.
    -More Tag teams and split championships? Agreed.
    -Kick ass music? Can care less... Listen to your MP3 if you don't like their music.
    -Scrap Guest Hosts? No just get some who know SOMETHING about FREAKIN' wrestling please!! PS- No Dennis Miller.
    -The Rock will get into the HOF when he steps into the ring one more time.
    -Chris Benoit. Might just a LONG time from now.
    -Agree that the WWE were douches for not mentioning Umaga but mention Jack" I didn't wrestle in WWE" Brisco.
    -John Morrison and R-Truth are rivaling MizShow for the tag titles because they are more marketable for a Wrestlemania then Hart Dynasty or Cryme Tyme. Not saying they're better, but more people will feel those 2 in a tag match at the grand daddy of them all is more worth the money. My opinion, WM26 should be headlined by HBK vs. Taker 2 than Cena vs. Batista. Reason is because if Shawn retires, he deserves that spot to bid his farewell rather then a rushed 5 min segment on the PPV. Jericho vs. Edge should headline, it will be a contender for MOTN or MOTY. Bank on that.
    
    
    

    Posted by Tru Reazon on Thursday, March 11, 2010

16. Comment #16

    Laz, my answer to that is DUMB ASS MOVE by TNA!! WWE wins, 3.4 to 1.0. Way to make a statement TNA.

    Posted by Tru Reazon on Thursday, March 11, 2010

17. Comment #17

    Not gonna lie, I enjoy your articles Nemesis, keep it up.
    
    p.s. I am all for the Benoit thing too

    Posted by Ryder on Thursday, March 11, 2010

18. Comment #18

    Okay, what makes you think they'll add Benoit? I'm sure everyone saw McMahon apologizing for dedicating an episode of RAW to The Crippler the week after! Bringing back TRUE hardcore would be a dream come true, and everyone likes a Crimson Mask every now and then; it shouldn't be saved for Hell in a Cell or the Elimination Chamber! What would really make sense? There's firing Rey Mysterio (he's dried up and one-dimensional unless they re-form a cruiserweight division, since the X division is a bunch of light heavyweight techs and eagles), putting Edge and Christian together (in a match or tagging together; they brought back D-X, why not recreate the best tag team WWE had during the Attitude Era?), and they need to LOSE this predictable nature! But then again, TNA has been predictable too, such as their main event being put at the front of the show, only for it to be thrown out so it's at the end of the show; kudos to Hogan for blading himself early early on.

    Posted by Ceno on Thursday, March 11, 2010

19. Comment #19

    i'd like to see Hornswaggle actually wrestle (if he can) instead of being a gimmick performer, though no matter what he will be a gimmick at-least he wouldn't be the charity case gimmick

    Posted by Comment # 18 on Thursday, March 11, 2010

20. Comment #20

    naive much?

    Posted by dan on Monday, March 15, 2010

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