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The Bouncing Articles: A rewind to Wrestlemania 27

The Bouncing Articles

By:

The Bouncer

             Nobody is in the Wrestlemania mood, so what better time is there to review one of the biggest disappointments? Let's look at Wrestlemania 27.

Sheamus Vs. Daniel Bryan

             So much for a title match. So much for a singles match. Why advertise a match that wasn't going to happen?

World Heavyweight Championship: Edge Vs. Alberto Del Rio (Royal Rumble winner)

             TO KICK THE SHOW OFF? Just to let you know, I am not counting the dark matches. Why didn't WWE specify that the prize of winning the Royal Rumble was to kick Wrestlemania off? What happened to headlining? What happened to main eventing? The match was pretty good actually. Better than that awful main event. I guess WWE didn't trust Edge in the main event because of his injury. That raises a question. WHY DID THEY HAVE HIM WIN??? I was pulling for Del Rio since I like seeing new people in the main event.

Cody Rhodes Vs. Rey Mysterio

             This was the best match on the card. Rhodes actually won this one. Don't worry I will still nitpick. Why did they have Rhodes lose at Extreme Rules? That just negated the win that Rhodes got here at Wrestlemania. Rhodes stole the show at Wrestlemania, and I praise him for that.

Kofi Kingston, Santino Marella, Kane, & The Big Show Vs. Wade Barrett, Heath Slater, Justin Gabriel, & Ezekiel Jackson

             You know the rule about tag matches at Wrestlemania. They HAVE to last under 5 minutes. This was a more recent rule implemented by WWE. WWE also couldn't make up their mind deciding whether or not Vladimir Kozlov was injured. Why would ANYBODY replace a good wrestler like Kozlov with that insult to wrestling known as Kofi Kingston?

Randy Orton (who got Kennedy fired) Vs. CM Punk

             I DON'T GET IT!!!! WHAT WAS SO GOOD ABOUT THIS MATCH???? I felt sorry for CM Punk. He almost got fired. He just had to be EXTRA careful. Not only did he have to worry about his part, he also had to worry that Orton (who got Kennedy fired) didn't overjump anything (like a back suplex). This was definitely the most overrated match on the whole card. I even saw everything what was coming. I knew that horrible finisher would hit CM Punk at that time. You know the rule. You can't work on a wrestler's joint and win because of it. Look at Wrestlemania 23. MVP worked on Benoit's arm and ended up losing.

Jerry Lawler Vs. Michael Cole

            This should have been the end. I don't think feuds should continue through Wrestlemania. I say they should either end there or start after. They could have done better with this match. I hate when a long match goes to waste because of a stupid disqualification. This match was about 13 minutes long. THIRTEEN MINUTES WASTED!!!! Also, why was Swagger a part of this match? Why wasn't he in the World Heavyweight Championship match?

The Undertaker Vs. Triple H

             It seems like WWE finished trusting new people to fight The Undertaker. That explains why there is ANOTHER rematch. Next year they will probably have Mark Henry fight him again or possible Randy Orton (who got Kennedy fired). There are even rumors of having Triple H fight him FOR A THIRD TIME. Why not Wade Barrett? Why not Sheamus? Why not Snitsky? The other thing that annoyed me was that this match go so much praise. Why? It was just another match to add to his streak. WWE needs to step it up with the storylines of the streak. I say stop doing rematches. Do not negate the original matches. Leave the original matches alone and get a new opponent. WWE has a lot of people on their roster. Not that many people have challenged the streak. There are a lot of people in WWE that I believe can carry a match with The Undertaker.

Trish Stratus, Snooki, and John Morrison Vs. Layla, Michelle McCool, and Dolph Ziggler

             This storyline could have been done without John Morrison and Dolph Ziggler. This was an INSULT to those 2 wrestlers. Wrestlemania would be fine with John Morrison Vs. Dolph Ziggler. Why waste their talent? They could have been in the Money In The Bank match (which WWE shouldn't have removed). Now let me explain who exactly Snooki is. She is some random contestant on a stupid reality show. This raises up a pretty interesting question. WHY DOES SHE GET AN AIRED WRESTLEMANIA MATCH BEFORE SNITSKY???? How can WWE do this? Who were they trying to attract? Was it worth it? DEFINITELY NOT!!!! Now let's look at some controversy. WHO CARES THAT JOHN MORRISON DIDN'T HUG TRISH??? He is still the best wrestler ever. That “cold shoulder” didn't affect the show at all. I didn't even notice he did it until everybody kept saying he did. This wouldn't have happened if John Morrison was the WWE Championship holder to begin with. What is the big deal about it anyways? It isn't professional? It didn't affect the show at all. I even know somebody that removed John Morrison from their top 5 because of this stupid “incident”. People are focusing on the wrong things.

WWE Championship: The Miz Vs. John Cena

             See? They can't make Cena lose fairly, so what do they do? They have The Rock interfere. Was it a good move? Of course not. Why can't WWE trust The Miz to beat Cena fairly? Hasn't he proven himself already? You know what? I will stop ranting on this match here. I will not even go into detail on how horrible this match was.

The Bouncing Q & A

             Once again, it is time for my Q & A session. If you have a REASONABLE question about wrestling, then what are you waiting for? ASK IT!!!!

Q: How do you feel about Derrick Bateman coming back to NXT?

A: It absolutely sickens me. He gets automatic immunity from the first 4 eliminations? Now WWE won't even recognize Conor as the the person that got third place (he should be first anyways). Let me give you an example. Imagine a 30 man Royal Rumble. 30 people have entered and 28 people have been eliminated. The last 2 people are exhausted. Then out of nowhere WWE decides to make it a 31 man Royal Rumble. The 31st contestant comes in and eliminates everyone else. Need another example? Imagine a racetrack. There are 2 cars near the end. A random car gets added and gets to start right in front of the finish line. Also, that is the only lap he has to go through. You get the 3 cars near the end. If the added car wins, that would definitely be unfair.

             Well that is it. I hope you enjoyed my review of this horrible Wrestlemania. It seems to have been getting worse every year since 2007.

GOODNIGHT!!!!

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Comments

  1. Comment #1

    AYO, it is not like he is botching a simple suplex or anything. He is botching a corkscrew moonsault!! He doesn't even botch it that often. His promos aren't bad. The only thing he needs to work on is to stop with the random laughing. John Morrison is the greatest wrestler that WWE has ever had.

    Posted by The Bouncer on Monday, July 11, 2011

  2. Comment #2

    Lol, all of a sudden CM Punk delivers a random promo and then randomly becomes better in the ring than Morrison (according to the IWC).

    Posted by The Bouncer on Thursday, July 14, 2011

  3. Comment #3

    Punk is better than Morrison, better finisher....better promos....better matches. Morrison's matches are too spotty and lame. He can't tell a story other than, "I wonder what Melina is gonna be wearing tonight" -_-

    Posted by AYO on Friday, July 15, 2011

  4. Comment #4

    John Morrison maybe a good wrestler but mostly he botches his finishing move which aint cool for him.

    Posted by Annoyer on Sunday, July 17, 2011

  5. Comment #5

    WRONG! CM Punk is the best WRESTLER WWE has ever had. John Morrison is too cheesy and lame during his promos and he's destined for mid-card hell -.-

    Posted by AYO on Wednesday, July 13, 2011

  6. Comment #6

    Why the hell do you want John Morrison as the WWE Champion? He can't do a proper promo and I cannot take a man seriously when he botches his finishing move most of the time

    Posted by AYO on Sunday, July 10, 2011

  7. Comment #7

    JMorrison has everything a woman could want in a wrestler, goodlooking, muscles,sexy abs, funny and athletic. Did I say goodlooking? I love CMPunk too but I don`t think he is a better wrestler. I love the starship pain done from the outside of the ropes onto the floor(hits it too!). Who the hell else does their finisher like that!JMorrison is laid back and terrific in interviews away from the ring.He has said that he is shy. I think he has charisma and is my alltime favourite.

    Posted by Eliza on Monday, July 18, 2011

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