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The ECW X-Press! 7/1/08 |
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ECW July 1st 2008-Tulsa, Oklahoma *This is Curtis Kash (your regular Smackdown reporter) filling in for The Glide for one week only, as The Glide is takin a well deserved break:) Hope you all arent too dissapointed! LOL. Anyways enough of the small talk....* Pre-show run-through: Off the back of Night of Champions and we have a new ECW Champion in Mark Henry (God help us all). Kane is entitled to a rematch but as we all know is now a Raw lacky....so will Kane ignite his rematch clause or just leave it go to pursue different ventures on Monday Nights?....Same can be said of Big Show,,,will he want more of The Worlds Fattest Man?....I for one think ECW was shafted in the Draft...The 4 best workers (Kane, Crazy Mariachi Punk *Sorry Glide* , Shelton and Kofi) were all drafted away...that sucked cause I like everyone else was diggin the Shelton-Kofi feud...but I am looking forward to seeing what Matt hardy, Finlay, Super Crazy etc bring to the table......we'l see:) (opening video) Must say I really like the Intro Music...suits ECW nicely and the old song was a bit worn out wasnt it? Lights,Camera,Action! And Unfortunately, we open with the NEW ECW CHAMPION (its all downhill from here folks) Mark Henry. He begins by putting himself over (because nobody else will) and mentioning that he was the brand’s survivor (?) because Kane and Big Show wrestle elsewhere. How much would you care to wager that one or both of them are on ECW TV sometime within the next month? I advise not to put your years supporter on it anyway! Tommy Dreamer and his sidekick Colin "The Un-Stoppable Force" Delaney interrupt him. Dreamer cuts a familiar promo putting over the history of the ECW championship and those who held it (the likes of Shane Douglas and The Sandman etc). The issue with this was that he was referring to the original ECW which simply does not resonate with the great majority of current fans. Aside from the dropping of Tazz’s name, his promo got little reaction. Dreamer wants a title shot but Henry, who I guess has GM authority now, made a match between Delaney and himself. If Delaney wins, Dreamer gets a title shot.....my years supporter is on Delaney;) *The two top babyfaces on the brand (Finlay and Matt Hardy) are walking backstage for a tag match next. You would never see John Cena or Batista just thrown into a match with no build-up like this on Raw. Even though this is the minor league brand, you still have to make its top stars mean something. If you do not (and WWE does not), how is anyone supposed to get over? Ah lets just get to it! Match #1: Matt Hardy, Finlay and Hornswoggle VRS. Chavo Guerrero, The Miz & John Morrison
(ads) Guerrero has Hardy in a chin lock. Miz scores a near fall off of a snap suplex. The champs hit their patented double team move (Morrison leaping onto a prone opponent on Miz’ knees, it really needs a name). The heels stay with the rest holds which is not good for a six-man tag team match let me tell you. Hardy hits a quick sunset flip to tease the hot tag but Miz regains control with a lariat. Hardy finally hits the side effect to lead to the hot tag. Adamle had another gem here as he claimed "that move hurt Hardy as much as his opponent"....How is this guy on the same salary as JR? Finlay hits the Celtic cross but Morrison saves. In the ensuing fracas, Hornswoggle hits the tadpole splash (Hilarious) which coupled with another Celtic cross scores the win. The announcers make a point of Hornswoggle using the Guerreros’ patented hold.
The match was a bit disappointing given the talent involved and to be honest, this match was a bit of a snoozer. ECW used almost all their best talent in just this one match...I get the feeling the rest of the night is doomed..... *We are shown a Lengthly recap of CM Punk’s World Title Win and first title defense on Raw. May I be one of the first to say..WELL DONE PUNK! I just hope he's not a paper champion and just holding passing the title from Edge to Cena... *Backstage, Tommy tries to talk Delaney out of the match but Delaney is having none of it. Go Colin you animal! *Elsewhere, Teddy Long (Holla Holla) speaks with Armando Estrada (and his abs...keepin up tradition Glide!) whose contractual status is "under review". Long introduces Estrada to Atlas Ortiz and makes a match between the two tonight. Ortiz is Atlas DaBone, who received decent reviews down in developmental, Im not a huge fan of his but I do think he works well. Match #2: Atlas Ortiz v. Armando Estrada Ortiz is billed from Paradise Valley, Arizona which is also the kayfabe home of 'Superstar' Billy Graham. They start with chain wrestling on the mat. Ortiz hits a shoulder charge in the corner and then misses a second. Estrada gets a near fall off a single arm DDT. He keeps on the offense which was a terrible idea as knows virtually NO moves. Next is a whole lot of nothing, then Ortiz makes a comeback with a back drop and drop kick for a 2 count. Ortiz then gets the debut win with a backslide; yes, a backslide...dull enough way to start your WWE career eh? Winner Via Pinfall: Atlas Ortiz (Debut win...if it was over anyone other then Estrada I would be impressed) You could hear crickets for the duration of this match save for what once sounded like fifteen people saying "Let’s go Atlas." In 10 years of watching wrestling, that is as bad of an in ring debut as I can recall: a bad performance against the wrong opponent with a terrible finish. (ads) The Maaaaaain Event!: Mark Henry v. Colin Delaney The match began at 11:01 eastern which was a bit of a spoiler. Henry no sells some strikes and pounds on Delaney for a bit. He misses an elbow which leads to Delaney landing a dropkick. Henry reasserts himself with a lariat, head butt and then an impressive gorilla press slam! He finishes the poor kid off with the Worlds Fattest (excuse me Strongest) Slam.... Winner via Pinfall: Mark Henry (his ECW Title Reign is off to a great start....*notice the sarcasm*) An absolute pitiful main event and why am I not surprised? The Draft as well as the Fallout from NOC has effected ECW badly.....REAL Badly....Somebody take the belt off Mark Henry now...im not even willing to give him a chance to run with it...im fed up with him after just one show.......Rob Van Dam where art thou? OVERALL ANALYSIS This week’s show was a fairly poor effort even by this show’s meager standards and the only plus was that since Kofi was drafted off, we didint have to hear Adamle use that stupid "Jamaican me crazy" Gag...hopefully Michael Cole wont start with it lol...The one match which one would figure would be fun came in as a bit of a disappointment. More concerning was the fact the brand’s best four wrestlers competed in a match which had no buildup earlier in the show nor any follow up later in the show. Atlas Ortiz’s debut was beyond terrible and he’s pretty much dead on arrival. Finally, the main angle involving Henry, Dreamer and Delaney is nothing going out of your way to see. This writer cant wait to get back to the comfort of reporting Smackdown..... Overall Show Grade: D- Thats it for this edition of The ECW Ex-Press with me, Curtis Kash. The Glide is back next week so this was a one time deal...Im back to Smackdown reports full time now. Hope I did your article justice Glide lol. Views: 1,080 
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COMMENTS |
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Comment # 1
Not bad. One issue though... Match 2. If you were truly carrying on the tradition it should have been a handicap match.
Oh wait... as bad as it sounded... it was a handicap match. My bad.
Posted by Kodiac on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 2
You do the Glide proud. NIce review. I agree with most of it. i kinda like Henry though. He's been with the company a while and I think he may have earned a title like this. And he aint fat, he's strong dammit. I sorely missed Evan Bourne. Not Knox. Nice review though. And if The Glide is still considering people for articolist put in a good word for me.
Posted by White Ranger on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 3
Where the heck did Evan Bourne go? Did he move shows or did they just decide not to use him?
Posted by Raythe on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 4
You´re right Raythe. I like Evan. As i see his Shooting Star press, i was really impressed.
Posted by Bourbreaster on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 5
Give Dreamer the Title!
He can carry ECW much better than Mark Henry!
Posted by Alexrules01 on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 6
mark henry is useless he has to be the least pouplar ecw champion of all time.
Posted by icarlisle603 on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 7
i dont know about doing glide proud but it was alright. yet that gorilla slam was not that impressive and damn i never thought henry could get any slower but he proved it but i do agree the armando vs atlas match was a stinker. it was one of the most dreadful matches ive seen in a long time plus i believe atlas needs to go back to developmental he's just not entertaining to watch. ecw should have a bunch of japanese wrestlers. it would be far more entertaining
Posted by azuzu on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 8
You know what, I was willing to give WWE a chance, I thought: cloud with a silver lining, so to speak - with such a sparse ECW roster again, the one plus is that they'll get the opportunity, and maybe even a kick up the proverbial rear end, to use some of the talent they never seemed to want to push properly before. How wrong was that optimism? They have an upcoming star in Bourne, he wasn't even on the show. They could try to use Richards again, they decided not. Wasn't Super Crazy drafted? Nowhere to be seen. A debut isn't bad but that sounded like a really bad debut, so that cancels that out. As much as people aren't into him, they've been pushing Knox a bit, and he does have some good offense. But hey let's do nothing with that, either, shall we. Once again I must start slapping people upside their faces for jumping on the "let's hate Henry" bandwagon (including the author, sorry). People are really unfair to him and I think he has earned the title. But a dull squash versus Delaney doesn't exactly help that situation. The three (was it three?) matches sounded like nobody bothered to write the show and then at the last minute they thought, "Oh, hey, we've got to do that ECW thing haven't we? Quick, throw something together before it starts!" I didn't find it on the 'tube yet, which I normally do, and watch, beside this report, reading it in-between watching it. But by the sound of this show I'm almost glad I didn't waste the time. If the WWE really want to give up ECW, then they should just give up ECW. If they really want to keep it, then they should be doing something with it! Eh, nevermind. Nicely written, btw.
Posted by Jane Ross on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 9
I also think you did the Glide proud but disagree with some things as others who have commented do. All in All but nice job. Mark Henry vs Colin Delaney as the main event?!?! I think we all agree that this match was like masturbating with a cheese grater ..... slighlty amusing but mostly painful.
I find myself agreeing with the Henry haters sorry. Look it may not even be his fault though, I mean afterall what kind of writers Bill a superstar as the "worlds strongest man" and 'The Silverback' and then turn him into a pussy jobber who only fights little men? Bad ones thats who!
I wish Colin Delaney would go eat a heap of cornflakes and choke on one and die personally, what a lame gimmick.
Raw this week was pretty decent but, hopefully Smackdown will be just as decent. Anyways whatever right? Hopefully they are disapointing us now in order to pleasently surprise us later? We can only wait and see :)
That's my 2 cents worth spent anyways, peace ;)
Posted by Yuri on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 10
Evan Bourne wasn't allowed to perform on ECW because the shooting star press is a banned move since its so dangerous. And this review is great, nice job Curtis.
Posted by TigerBomb on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 11
AAAAWWWWSSSSOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEE.
Posted by chris on Thursday, July 03, 2008
Comment # 12
Recently, Vince was looking for more african american wrestlers because of the many that were relaeased; and that the african american viewing of WWE was slipping. There was also no reason why Mark Henry was added to the match at the last minute. There was also a poll on a website where over  %71 of the voters believed that Henry won because of his race. i honestly think it was the right choice for vince. henry is a dominant wrestler, good material for a champion. he needed this push.
Posted by facts on Friday, July 04, 2008
Comment # 13
It's WWECW at it's crappiest. I've proclaimed in the past that the show is a disgrace to the history of a storied promotion and should be ignored with extreme prejudice. The only thing extreme about the show now is how bad it sucks. The report was good though.
Posted by Beefcake Jack on Friday, July 04, 2008
Comment # 14
I am a men!
Posted by Hoston on Friday, July 04, 2008
Comment # 15
Good article...your well capable of fillin anyones shoes Kash...
Posted by The Solja Boy on Friday, July 04, 2008
Comment # 16
O Maior Overall Do ECW Legends é do The Rock,96 no play station 2,e o meior é 97 do JohnCena mais ele n é fo ecw legens =)
Posted by Giuseppe on Saturday, July 05, 2008
Comment # 17
Simply put, we all know already that Mark Henry was given that title due to the "racist" remarks make by others in the recent past.
With that said, I think what ECW needs is a healthy dose of old school matches. Get some good old fashioned, hard fought, long drawn out matches that ends after a solid 20 minutes with a flurry.
How? Well, building up better talent would help. But still, it all depends on what people want to see, and what those moronic WWE writers put down on paper, doesn't it???
Posted by Koj Tije Dedo on Saturday, July 05, 2008
Comment # 18
The ECW World title is the hard workers' title. Any one who has been in the company for many years and hasn't done much has gotten the title. For example, the past three champs(Chavo Guerrero, Kane, and Mark Henry) have been WWE wrestlers for at least 7 years without doing much. Now I know Kane had the WWE title, but he had it for only one night. One night! So anyway, the ECW title is their reward for working hard for the company for so many years. Henry will hold the title until WWE wants to reward another former jobber(Gregory Helms, Tommy Dreamer, etc.)
Posted by hitmanricks on Sunday, July 06, 2008
Comment # 19
hitman ricks dude you are one hundred pecent on the money. i agree with every word
Posted by azuzu rules on Sunday, July 06, 2008
Comment # 20
Nice commentary. Very in touch with the show. Mark Henry has been around long enough to develop a heel fanbase. So we hate him. We think he is not worthy of the position he is in. That is what the company wants from us. So the next champion will be accepted unanimously.
And anyone watching Matt gimp around the ring? The poor boy has given it all to the show. Wonder how much longer he can last?
Now that Kane, the Big Show, CM Punk, Shelton, and Kofi have jumped ship, who is left to challenge Mark? Matt? Wonder how much longer he can last, again?
Posted by Junior on Sunday, July 06, 2008
Comment # 21
where's Jeff Hardy it should have been Matt,Jeff,Hornswoggle
Posted by ben grant on Sunday, July 06, 2008
Comment # 22
Well done Curtis, and I must say I'm going to have WAY too much fun making fun of Mark Henry as champ. Thank you for warming the crowd up for that. :D
If Tommy Dreamer wins the ECW championship from Henry it would be the greatest moment of my wrestling life. Which may say something about the recent quality of wrestling. But hey.
Posted by The Glide on Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Comment # 23
Colin "The Un-Stoppable Force" Delaney!!!WOOT.
Leave henry alone, he deserves to have the title. but dont keep it on him forever :/
good report Curtis, ill be looking forward to your SD! report.
Posted by R.U.Sty on Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Comment # 24
henry has no compatition on ecw
Posted by james feather on Thursday, July 10, 2008
Comment # 25
Aw dammit, i like mike knox, or at least the new monster heel mike knox, because he sure as hell beats snitsky. But if they banned his shooting star press, is evan bourne got much of a career outside of motor city machine guns-eque tag matches? his attire is very omninous... Anyhoo i do seriously agree that they need to pump more of the old school ecw feel into the damn thing. Hell, the mix they had when they were just bringing it back was perfect, and i wish they would go back, however an industry as old and big as WWE isnt just going to cut they're losses on something as big as the new ecw. there has to be somethin big on the horizon... just gotta keep tellin myself that.
Posted by Mr. Groove on Saturday, July 12, 2008
Comment # 26
Do we fight on this
Posted by Kechard on Monday, July 21, 2008
Comment # 27
cmpunk desurves the wwe spinner
Posted by hardcore10 on Thursday, July 24, 2008
