The Mind Of A Maniac: JBL vs HBK

Announcer: Warning! The following are not the opinions of this network, but of the host of the show. If anyone is offended, please sue Jay McBang, not the companies he is a part of. Continue at your own risk.  

"Acceptance" by The Importance of Poison begins to play. As a clip is aired of the wrestler performing his craziest moves

Announcer: Ladies and Gentleman, from Memphis, Tennessee, “The Memphis Maniac” Jay MCBang

Dressed in his finest…eh…”suit”, with his goody bag by his side 
Good day. This is your resident maniac, Jay McBang. I have a new bottle of pills and a new topic… so let’s see what’s inside…

  The Mind of a Maniac
By: “The Memphis Maniac” Jay McBang  To update people on the going-ons in my life, I’m a college student going into his final semesters before graduation, so I have a lot of homework and stuff that’s hurting my writing. Due to this, I will now only have bi-weekly reports. However, this will give me more time to get exactly what I want to say in this thing without the “hurry-up” of a one-week deadline. I hope my fans can understand this, however I understand if you don’t. Just know it’s for your benfit that I’m cutting back the articles.

    Now, onto the random thoughts.1. Randy and Shane-O Mac was a great match! Both men were brutal (though I’d would have liked to see more blood) and the bring-in of HHH was brilliant!2. So Hardy vs Hardy will be at WM 25 it looks like. I predict a TLC match, with the winner getting a shot at the brand Champion at Backlash. 3. CAGE ON ECW?!!? I know what I’m writing on next time! :-)4. Usually just three, but this has to be mentioned. The elimination chambers did not go how I planned. I really didn’t want to see Edge/Cena and HHH/Orton again… though both give the potential for great matches.

    Now, onto the topic. Three weeks ago, I mentioned I was going to do the HBK and JBL feud. Well… here it is. One of the best, and if you’re a fan of the old days, only true, rivalry the WWE has going right now.

    Before we get into the feud itself, let’s take a brief (very brief) look at the participants.John Bradshaw Layfield is a man already destined for the Hall of Fame. He is the longest reigning world champion in Smackdown! history, with his title reign of 280 days. In WWF/E, Layfield is a one time WWE Champion, a one time United States Champion, a one time European Champion, a seventeen time Hardcore Champion, and a three time World Tag Team Champion with Faarooq (Ron “Damn!” Simmons) as part of the Acolytes Protection Agency (APA). He also was a commentator during his simi-retirement, as he tried to find a way to fix his back. Once he got healed, he came back to us as the same-old heel JBL we love to hate. Woo….. Layfeild has had many gimmicks over the years. However, after he made himself a fortune on Wall Street, the WWE began his gimmick as it is today, which is based on his real success and his tough-Texan attitude. (This is important for later). He is one of the better heels, but he can make a really funny good guy when given the chance.Like I said, these overviews will be brief.

    Shawn Micheals…. What can I say? He started in Mid-south wrestling, during the decade when it was “the” place to be! His accomplishments include WWF Championship (3 times)WWF European Championship (1 time) WWF Intercontinental Championship (3 times) WWF/E World Tag Team Championship (4 times) – with Diesel (2), Steve Austin (1), and John Cena (1) World Heavyweight Championship (1 time) two-time Royal rumble winner, with one of them have him entering at #1, and he has the First Grand-Slam winner, and the fourth triple-Crown winner. Micheals was also in the first Ladder match and the first Ironman Match. He was also a WWE commissioner, to give his back a chance to heal-up after a casket match with The Undertaker. Micheals is an innovator of matches and is still one of the best promo guys in the business. He and Undertaker are the only two men left that were on the very first RAW. (This is also important for later).

    So, how did we get to this rivalry?  Believe it or not, it’s quite simple, and it all comes from a movie. No…I haven’t skipped my pills today…..The Wrestler, if you haven’t heard, came out a few months ago, and it’s about an aging wrestler. One of the characters is almost too old and needs money somehow, and get’s an investment from somebody or something along those lines. At first, WWE shunned the movie and didn’t want anything to do with it, but as it became more popular, they tried to incorporate it. In comes the storyline.HBK comes out and admits he has financial troubles. And he had to borrow money from a millionaire. *DING DING DING DING DING DING DING* Out comes JBL and says Shawn is his employee and will do whatever he wants. By the grin on his dumb face, you’d think he’d bought himself a servant more then a man who really can get anybody to the top if he really wanted to help.

    So JBL abuses and misuses poor old Shawn, making him do things against Shawn’s morals and pride, even telling him to lie down during a match that JBL won to get to the Rumble Title match. FYI: Shawn took a Clothesline from Hell before he laid down. Good for Shawn!Random thought; When are they going to change the name to Clothesline from Heck or Hades… you know, since we’re playing to the children now.Micheals then had to win a match to get JBL into the chamber. HBK failed, leaving Layfield out of the chamber. He then gives HBK the chance to win his way out of the contract, with JBL paying it in full at a match at No Way Out. JBL abuses Micheals leading up to the match, as HBK can’t strike him until the match at the pay-per-view. In a very physical battle, HBK wins, getting his money and ending the fued….OR DOES HE?!!?

    JBL comes out during RAW on the 16^th, and, par normal, talks some trash. He then says it is his destiny to beat the Undertaker’s streak at Wrestlemania (ha). Then, just when we’re abut to change the channel... Oh! Oh! Shawn!Shawn Micheals comes out with an intent look on his face. He challenges JBL to a match next week (the 23^rd) to see who faces The Undertaker at Wrestlemania 25! I think HBK will win this match and the two remaining RAW originals will fight for ultimate glory at the 25^th anniversary of Wrestlemania! However, I’m usually in a fantasy world, so I’ll tell you what I think should happen.JBL and HBK battle it out, but neither men win after a double count-out or something. Shane or Stephanie make the decision that it will be Undertaker vs HBK vs JBL. Now, all of us will call this a “Best Texan Match”, as Undertaker has been billed from Houston and technically lives there, there’s one of two ways this could go. One, winner gets a world title shot or two, and most likely of scenarios, it becomes a “Loser Retires” match. *Jay waits as the collective gasps and whispers simmer down*Yes, a “Loser Retires” match. This leads to the scenarios that JBL can never get back to 100%, HBK and Undertaker are both getting too old, and one of them has to pin the other to send them to the retirement home.

    Each of these has their own unique ways of coming about.1) Undertaker: Undertaker loses the match at his last Wrestlemania. Everyone cries, but we all know it’s his time. Undertaker comes back once and a while over the next three years for special appearances, but WWE has a huge whole to feel with his absence. I see it being HBK who pins him, continuing the general feeling of him being “The only one to handle the deamons that come with ending someone’s carrer.”2) John Layfield: John’s back just won’t go right. He doesn’t feel like he can do it anymore. Layfield keeps his Fox Business job and, maybe, even goes back to commentating (with a little work he could be as good as Tazz…). Layfield probably wouldn’t disappear forever, if he retired or not. Either man could really be the one ending it here.3) Shawn Micheals: If he doesn’t lose the match, he becomes the new Ric Flair very quickly. Every wrestler will be the one to “end” him, and depending on which way he wants to go, he’ll either help the new good guys with wisdom or the bad guys with dirty tactics. I can only see Undertaker beating him, really.So, that’s it, that’s all I got. You’ve seen my favorite scenarios, and, as is the purpose of all these articles, I hope it gets your minds working as well.

    Next week, which actually is in two weeks, as mentioned earlier, I’m going to talk about Captain Charisma himself, Christian “Cage”. I hope you join me when we go into… The Mind of a Maniac
By: “The Memphis Maniac” Jay McBang 

Comments

1. Comment #1

   Great article. Kinda short though

   Posted by RockyVlad on Monday, February 23, 2009

2. Comment #2

   You forgot to mention Michaels was in, and won, the first ever hell in a cell match against the Undertaker.
   But otherwise, great article, but I agree with RockyVlad, it was kinda short. Especially if you are not doing them so often.

   Posted by The Warlock on Monday, February 23, 2009

3. Comment #3

   Just so everyone knows, I didn't write this article. I am the writer of The Showtime Chronicles. There was a misake done in the name for the author. Btw, great article!

   Posted by Johnny Martin on Monday, February 23, 2009

4. Comment #4

   That sucks

   Posted by Kyle on Tuesday, February 24, 2009

5. Comment #5

   Just kidding That rocks

   Posted by Kyle on Tuesday, February 24, 2009

6. Comment #6

   Great report!
   Good luck in your studies!

   Posted by Dynamo on Tuesday, February 24, 2009

7. Comment #7

   Christian might just be the reason we have the draft warly this year

   Posted by EddieRox on Tuesday, February 24, 2009

8. Comment #8

   The reason WWE is having a draft, is so Cena and HHH can switch brands. Since Cena will feud with Edge and HHH will feud with Orton. HBK V.S JBL has got to be the most WORST feud I ever seen, it's so bad. HBK is rich and then WWE has an angle where he has to be poor. And he cries about it. JBL is a great wrestler, the best WWE Champion I ever seen.
   
   Most of you don't care for the bad guys, that's good because there doing there jobs then, as I like Edge, Orton and Jericho. JBL fits in there to.

   Posted by Knuckles on Thursday, February 26, 2009

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