 |
The Smackdown Re-bound! 10/10/08 |
 |
Back to home
 Pre-show run-through:A big What’s Up to all my Peeps and Peepettes. Another edition of The Smackdown ReBound is upon us.....Off the back of No mercy and it seems some things never change.....Rey Mysterio is still small....Batista is still crap....and HHH is still INVINCIBLE! What fun is the title hunt going to be if HHH is just going to swat away anything that opposes him, both physically AND verbally? I’m hoping that Undertaker enters the title frame, not for the fact that I get to see them go at it in the ring....but also we get to see how HHH's backstage politics fare against Takers nowadays..... So here we are, new network, new era, enough of the small talk...... (opening video) (I’m diggin the new music...really) *Clips of the Big Slow-Taker match from No Mercy on Sunday (I’m NOT digging the accompanying music) Lights, Camera, Action! Welcome to the Guerrerro Show, Chavo and Vickie are in the ring. Vickie goes through her typical "EXCUSE ME" crap.....She's not in the mood for the fans tonight (as if they are in the mood for her...silly me) She's in a neckbrace and a wheelchair (Wasn’t this card played already?). She talked about getting attacked 2 weeks ago at the hands of Taker (It was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen!....Youtube it!). Vickie said that Taker "Got His"at No Mercy- he was dominated and humiliated by Big Show. She said he would be rewarded for taking out Taker with a match for the WWE Title.......wait for it......TONIGHT! Oh Boy:) Cue The Big Dum Dum himself, strolling out smiling...waving....yeah, Happy Guy. Show said he told everyone what was going to happen, but we didn’t believe him (Well, I did!). He said Taker would never be the same, then showed Show's KO (For all you idiots, that means KnockOut) on Taker on Sunday. Show put over his powerful right hand (Pity he didn’t use that against Floyd Mayweather oooooh), then turned his attention to HHH. Show talks about scrambling the brain of HHH or something (he was probably daydreaming of the scrambled eggs he had earlier in the morning). As Show raised his arms in presumed victory, "here comes trouble", Vlad Kozlov came out to interrupt. Kozlov spoke in Russian, basically saying (**$$#skjluhhgi) and challenging the winner of tonights maaaaaaain event. Show said he will give him 2 reasons to reconsider: One....He’s a giant, and Two, he’s American. What does that have to do with anything? Discrimination eh? The two stare each other down as we go to commercial (Good....I was getting dizzy) (ads) Match #1: Natalya vrs Brie Bella #1 Victoria (Who has been hinting retirement this week for those of you that don’t know) came out with Natalya here. Brie got a take-down immediately, and referee Charles Robinson (The little Blonde guy who did the WMania 24 sprint....I’ll never forget it) had to break them up. Springboard cross-body by Brie. Natalya bridged out of a pin but Brie got a back-slide for one. Spinning clothesline by Natalya that almost took Brie out of her boots. Brie went under the ring, and Victoria took hold of her heels, which pulled Victoria half-way under the ring. When she came out, Hornswoggle (For the love of God...) peeked out from underneath, then chased Victoria to the back (Why would Victoria run from Hornswoggle? She would crush him like a bug!). On the other side, Brie Bella #2 peeked out from underneath and smiled at Natalya. Less than 2 seconds later, Brie came out from the OTHER side of the ring. Natalya looks about as dumb as a confused Hick right now and is pinned courtesy of a Crucifix roll-up..... Something tells me they are getting closer to revealing the secret......DUH! Winner Via Pinfall: Brie Bella #1 or #2 (Not sure who did the covering here!) *The video from Raw about the John Cena-Batista match where Cena 'allegedly' suffered his injury...you all know how he got injured right...the REAL reason? I will tell you all at the end of the article....just be patient;) (ads) *Funaki was backstage (Yep thats right....FUNAKI), practicing his interviewing skills (SMACKDOWNS NO.1 ANNOUNCER RETURNS!.....ah, The Glory Days) when R-Truth came up to him. Truth gave him a mic, saying he might need that to do interviews. Funaki also tried to rap like Truth (it was cringing). Truth wanted to get to know Funaki better (Em...why?) Funaki said his middle name is Fu and his last name is Naki....whats his first name then? You guessed it....KUNG! KUNG FU NAKI!! Truth then started a song in the beat of Kung Fu Fighting and that’s when I decided to take a bathroom break (Wouldn’t you do the same?) *HHH was in his locker room, voting for the special referee at Cyber Sunday (There can obviously only be one winner there...). Jeff Hardy walked in and said it was unfair HHH had to defend his title five days after their match, against Big Show. Hardy said he doubted HHH would win, but said he would challenge the winner. I’m really not liking this love-in HHH and Hardy are having....someone grab a damn steel chair and start swingin! Match #2:(Non Title) Shelton vrs R-Truth R-Truth came out for his match through the crowd (which is starting to annoy me already). The interrupted his singing with a commercial break. I wish they'd do that more often!! Shelton Benjamin cuts a short promo on the 'Tron' about the economic turmoil and said something about being the Gold Standard. His typical promo.....Crap. Shelton was very aggressive at the bell, with the referee having to physically restrain him at times. He threw Truth out of the ring, and when he got in, Truth took Shelton to the mat. Shelton slid to avoid going into the ropes, then exploded with a clothesline. Shelton got Truth in a chin-lock, but Truth suplexed out of it. Corkscrew forearm by Truth, but Shelton came back with a back-breaker. Truth used a unique roll-up to pin Shelton out of nowhere. Nice finish. Winner via Pinfall: R-Truth (ads) *JR and Tazz plug Smackdowns ratings success last week. They are not lying, the Smackdown ratings have ben doing quite well recently. *They plugged the voting for the I.C. Title match at Cyber Sunday (I’m on the Val Venis band wagon til I die!) Match #3: Jeff Hardy vrs MVP Hurricane (oops I mean Gregory, sorry Gregory) Helms did an inset during MVPs entrance. Why, I don’t know. MVP got a couple pin attempts in. Hardy went to the top, but MVP took a break on the outside. Hardy was on the attack, but MVP turned it around after the show returned from break. MVP got a near-fall, and argued with referee about it. After a few rest-holds, MVP whipped Hardy into the buckle, but Hardy climbed to the top and hit Whisper in the Wind. Both men were down. Hardy with a dropkick, then a corner dropkick, a move that was countered earlier in the match. He took it to the top and hit the Swanton for the pin. A Fine TV match. MVPs punishment is apparently not over. Gives Hardy a win back after HHH beat him (and beat him good) at No Mercy... *After the match, Vlad Kozlov walked to the ring with a purpose (as he does) as Hardy was celebrating. Kozlov put his fists up for a fight, but Hardy kicked him in the gut. It was no-sold by Kozlov, so Hardy went to the middle rope. Kozlov headbutted him out of the air!! Grrrrrrr TIGER! Winner via Pinfall: Jeff Hardy *We have a New Superstar Vignette next....taking place at a carnival, for a character called KIZARNY.....they just get worse and worse I tell you.....Match #4: The Colons/Jesse/Festus vrs Ex-Edgeheads/Kenny + Ryan 'Who are ya' BraddockMaria came out to be special guest ring announcer for the next match (Eye Candy....nothing more). (Another) Helms inset noted that the heel four strikes fear in no one. Hawkins and Ryder worked over Carlito. Eventually all four heels got to get some offense in on him. Festus tagged in and got his usual offense in against everyone. Braddock broke up a pin by Festus, so Carlito took him out. Jesse and Carlito dove onto Ryder & Hawkins on the outside, so Festus finished off Dykstra in the ring.....whatever happened to Kenny? He once had potential...now he’s just a nothing. Winners via Pinfall: The Colons/Jesse + Festus*Another Cena surgery-recovery video. Get well soon John my boy (NOT).Match #5: The (Not so) Great Khali vrs 3 NobodiesKhali and his translator, Singh were in the ring and they played the Johnny Knoxville video interview with Khali (If you haven’t seen it Youtube it...Johnny touches on some "touchy" subjects!). Singh then cued up the Khali Kiss Cam from Raw, to show Khali could be a fun guy. He plugged Knoxville facing off with Khali on Raw on Monday night. Something like that was done before, if ye can remember, Steve-O and Bam took a beatdown off Umaga! *The Jobbers all ran at Khali but were (obviously) stopped in their tracks when he raised his arms!! All but one left the ring, leaving the one left to get a chop over the head (KHALI CHOP!) and a foot in the chest to get pinned. Another Khali Kiss Cam aired. Singh picked a rather...."large" lady out of the crowd to come in and kiss Khali. Jennifer Swanson from, of course, Spokane Washington. Singh asked her what she weighed (DAMN! This fan has to be planted), but she didn’t answer (Women usually don’t answer that question.....women eh?). She seemed mesmerized by Khali, but Khali wasn’t really as into it as Singh was hoping. Khali kept shaking his head no as Singh kept trying to convince him to do it. She finally took his hand and he kissed her. He raised his arms in victory. What the hell was that? He nearly swallowed her head (or did she nearly swallow his...? Hmmm) Winner Via Pinfall: The (Not so ) Great Khali (Ads) *Next week on SMACKDOWN, Kozlov will face Jeff Hardy.....Oh Boy:) *Kozlov cut a promo backstage and said (Blakgjdibjteg0wt43j) and also that he will "break" Hardy next week....How about he take a break and learn to speak English? The Maaaaaain Event!: WWE TITLE: HHH vrs Big Slow....Show Show used his mass and strength to keep HHH down, including a headbutt while HHH was on the apron (Doing his classic "water spitting" routine....what am I talkin bout...how the hell can something like water spitting be considered classic?). HHH was able to come back in, only to be greeted with a sidewalk slam! HHH got the boots up on another charge, then jumped on Shows back and applied a sleeper. HHH got a lot of offense in, but couldn’t take Show off his feet. Show blocked a Pedigree, picked HHH up and just landed on him (Yeah, very technical stuff here). Show missed a right hand, but HHH walked into a chokeslam. Show couldn’t capitalize though, as he was about to pick HHH up, the lights went out and the bell tolled (DONG!). When they came back on, Taker was staring at Show in the ring!! He started the beat-down, but Show got out of the ring and headed up the ramp. The lights went out again and when they came on, Taker was behind him (Taker must be doing a lot of running during these dark periods lol!) and beat him up some more, just punching him and punching him as they fought to the back. Vlad Kozlov then ran out (No English Lessons break then) and did some damage to HHH. After a headbutt put HHH down, Jeff Hardy ran out. Kozlov put him down until HHH and Hardy decided to work together (This love in is killing me) and then threw Kozlov out of the ring. The faces stared the heel down, then out of nowhere, Hardy hit the Twist of Fate on HHH! (Now thats what real opponents do to one another!) The two that have a match next week, Hardy and Kozlov, stared each other down as the show ended...... OVERALL ANALYSIS Just an ok show...The stuff they are doing with Khali, Jesse, Festus etc is ridiculous. I’m not getting my hopes up about this new guy either (I’ve forgotten his name already). R-Truth and Shelton keep their feud going, which I like. Kozlov is getting a nice push at the moment but I don’t see anything coming of it as he is just a pawn here as the main focus was and remains to be the HHH-Hardy angle. As for Show-Taker....been there.....done that....didn’t buy the T-Shirt as it wasn’t very trendy. This show needs something to spark it to life....or someone...........Where art thou? Ladieeeeees and Gents, I’m Curtis Kash and thanks for Reading!! Overall Show Grade: C- Views: 1,293 
|
|
COMMENTS |
|
Comment # 1
Enjoyed reading!
But I wouldn't rate the show C-... It's C+ at least. I would generously give it even B :) I really enjoy SD! recently... It's even more intersting than RAW now. IMHO.
And... there's "the REAL" Cena's injury reason? I need to know, I need to know! lol :D
Posted by ARK on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 2
Woo almost 1st. Good article, didn't watch SD! but it sounds more interesting than RAW like ARK was saying. Either way keep writing.
And what was Cena's "REAL" injury?
Posted by Hobosnail on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 3
3rd and i wanted to see if kozlov ever loses a matchcome on big show is fatter than him and even hes alost a match
Posted by The Crazy Sicko on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 4
what you didn't say a word about cena was that intentional or what
Posted by ficord on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 5
Nice Article
I love the way your workin up all the Cena fans.
As for the "Where art thou"...your calling out for Edge right..?
Posted by The One on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 6
smackdown and raw arent like they used to be they kinda stink nowdays i agree with the ratings
Posted by lyoko on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 7
smackdown was very lame how often do we have to see koslovs interruptions? i think we all get the point he's in a title match, now give him other matches? what ever happend to working yourself up into the title race instead of beating jobbers, koslovs headbutt is lame, is that even a move? its a soccer/football move! plus mvp is always in the same matchs they should give him a challenge. as for festus its only a matter of time until he gets the sack, shame really.
Posted by AZUZU on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 8
i wish they brought back backstage brawls that lasted for 10 minutes (like hardcore title styles, or when bigshow pinned essa rios on a wall) is that not entertainment?, bra and pantie matches although it is degrading in a way for females, if there willing to sign a playboy contract im sure b&p are no problems! plus i wanna see brie bella's nice little hmmm :) also i remember the fun days when superstars didnt like what the gm said so they'd hit them with they're finisher, they wernt scared of the "consequences". takers the only one left doing that! and stables what happend to stables? nation of domination, dx, the oddities, even evolution but WTF is priceless? i hope golddust joins that group! if dustin ever losses to santino then i promise you the only way i'll ever watch raw again is threw you-tube! plus hardcore match's what happend to brutality? probably all those law suits with bad parenting involved! and lastly confidence on the mic! rock, triple h, austin they have confidence but they can flow, i remember rock used to actually insult people who does that now? i think wwe superstars not only need acting lessons they need comedy lessons! i just hope if goldust comes back his back on the mic in his comedic ways, but they better not do a d'lo brown on him GOLDDUST RULES!!!! simply put wwe needs more titles
Posted by azuzu again on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 9
I'm definitely starting a Val Venis fan club. I will make a tacky banner and put "The Glide" and "Curtis Kash" at the top and post it in my ECW report. :D
Anyone else want in?
Posted by The Glide on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 10
Totally want in on that...
Mynetwork TV sucks, I can't actually see Smackdown. Thanks Cash
Posted by T-Bizzle on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 11
Triple H should lose the title soon. He's good on the mic but his "dominance" is such a bore now. Kozlov vs Hardy seems like a good match. I want to see Kozlov and Show go at it. Give Taker a title shot.
How about some hardcore matches on smackdown? It's a 2 hour segment, why not throw in a special match or two..
Posted by The blah on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 12
everytime i read your articles i have to start laughing i really love your way to talk about the show ^^
Posted by Fanax on Monday, October 13, 2008
Comment # 13
PS: It was Steve-O and Chris Pontius. :)
Posted by Hardcase on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 14
i want the Val Venis fan club banner! yay Val4Ever!
Posted by Jack Brinstone on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 15
I didn't agree with most of your opinions, but nice article.
I'm down for the Val Venis fan club though :)
Posted by The Philadelphia Phighter on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 16
nice article as always
and I'm down with the val venis fan club
Posted by The Stupifier on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 17
nice article kash :P
I'm down for the VV club :P
Posted by Some Guy Who Fought The Big Show Once *lol* on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 18
Better then last week, but what about Cena? Don't tell us to be patient for something that never came. Tht alowered your grade a bit...
Posted by Edge Head on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 19
What about me? What happened? I am not a Smackdown Star I belong on RAW!!! so what happened to me then already I want to know...
Posted by John Cena's Neck on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 20
I'm down with the Val Venis fanclub
Posted by Guslightning on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 21
I like this Val Venis Fanclub idea haha
Posted by Blazee on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 22
Ok Guys...I forgot to put in the REAL story behind Cenas injury....OOPS!
So tune into Next Weeks article to find out....hehe!
Posted by Curtis.. on Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Comment # 23
My big question is where is Umaga? We all heard his back wrestling, why isn't he on Smackdown? Is he getting pushed down? Don't know, sorta don't care, but he's a bigish name. I mean, R-Truth, while I'm not a fan of the gimmick (or rap) puts on a good match, but really, HHH holding the title, and Big Show and Taker brawling, with Jeff and Koslov in the mix is ok, but theres no... focus. Where's it going? As far as I can see, we have what... 4 guys after the title, the Taker sorta just around to torment Vick and Show. Then again, it likely won't get solved by Cyber Sunday. My guess, they might drag this out till all 5 (and likely 6 when Edge returns) fight it out in an elimnation chamber match.
ANYWHO, back to the show itself. I missed the first half hour (ironically, playing SmackdownVSRaw 2007). I came in around the time R-Truth was hanging with Funaki (why is he still around? Noble was way better.) Well wait, no I think I saw the Hornswaggle thing in the Diva's match, so whatever.
I hate Shelton Benjamin. They gave him a push for the olympics, the olympics came and went, and now we're still stuck with the guy. Hopefully very soon, R-Truth will hold the gold and we don't see Goldenboy for awhile again. Its only a matter of time, I mean, how many times does R-Truth gotta beat him?
The big tag match was sorta why Smackdown shouldn't have guys who hold the tag team title. The brand technically only has what, two-three actual tag teams? Proof being, the borrowed one from RAW (two maybe, are the Edgeheads still on Smackdown?). So naturally, the SD team is going to win on the SD show. Lame.
I only glanced towards Khali, and thats only to hear about Knoxville. I am a Jackass fan, and liked him in MIB2,the Ringer, and Dukes of Hazzard (featuring the Broken Lizard guys, funniest guys alive). Though I see this as a bigger fail than Cousin Sal. Kiss cam was almost cruel. We got a guy who looks like a shaved ape, acting put off by the woman. Planted or not, its just sickening. If your going to put a woman on stage like that, don't make cracks about her body.
Main Event... Triple H almost jobbing to Big Show. I guess this is about as much as HHH will give, he'll look like he can be beat, but won't actually lose the title. Truth be told, I'm almost convinced he's a spy for Vince, leading up to them reinstating Teddy Long as SD GM.
Lights, Gong, Taker's teleportation ability being shown off majorly (I guess since they went kid friendly, a guy who can teleport, summon lightning and flames can be used again, even if ironically, Taker loses to Show through a KO to make it seem more real.) Then the Koslov/Jeff/HHH thing again, Jeff turning on HHH, Koslov backing off (with HHH gone, why not then really go for it? Jeff is no threat to a guy like Koslov.)
More watchable than the network change premire, I would like to see some actual story going soon...
Oh, and I kinda like Kizarny... there I said it.
Posted by Dante S. Inferno on Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Comment # 24
*Crappy theme music plays* as Tater makes his way down the steps of the arena. He stops after about twenty steps and shouts Whazzup!!! Whazzup!!! to his tens of fans, then he proceeds another twenty steps with another set of Whazzups.
Tater speaks this time asking, what was "R-tooth in prison for?" Ya know, if Jeff got in trouble for it, why not R-Tooth. Whassup? really.
And one more thing. Kizarny... wait you're serious. KIZARNY. KIZRAP. KIZRAZY. KIZANT BELIEVE THIZIS.
Posted by Common Tater on Sunday, October 19, 2008
