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TNA Impact May 1 2008 |
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Why did TNA put two heel tag's against each other and two face tag's against each other? I don't know maybe because they don't want all faces in.. Who knows TNA is a good company, but said that they come up with whack ideas. Hour One: -Curry Man, Shark Boy vs Motor City Machine Guns- Back and forth.. Guns in main control until Sabin takes his eyes off Curry. Shark attacks Sabin. Shelley gets in and they hit double team moves on Curry. Curry and Sharky are tossed out of the ring, as the Guns do a dive through the ropes. The Guns get back into the ring...Scott Steiner, Petey Pump, and Rhaka Khan entered the ring and attacked the four "jobbers." Petey has bleached his short hair and grown a goatee to match Steiner -Winners:NO CONTEST- -Match Rating:0/5- -After the Match- Steiner cut a promo and said he's not only going to take Samoa Joe's title, but he's going to take Kurt Angle's Gold Medal and "make you my bit*&." That prompted Angle to the ring. Angle gave Steiner an uppercut, then tossed Petey over the top rope with a belly-to-belly. Angle then put Steiner in ankle lock. Petey hit Angle from behind with a pipe. Samoa Joe charged to the ring and took Pete and Steiner down with clotheslines. They rolled out of the ring. Good interaction between these three. It was kept short, but showed there are no two-on-one alliances. -Backstage with AJ Styles- Jeremy Borash backstage told A.J. Styles if he doesn't find a tag team partner, he'll be disqualified form the Deuces Wild tag team tournament. Styles paced and said, "I don't know. Usually I ask the stupid questions." He said it's not his fault that Tomko went to Japan and got hurt "in his MMA fight." He said he told him not to go. Styles asked Borash accusingly how Angle fought out about Karen last week. Cornette stepped out of his locker room and said at the end of the show he'll be announcing the singles wrestlers who'll be teaming up randomly to face the winners of the qualifying tag team matches for the Deuce's Wild tournament. Cornette asked Styles what he usually does on Thursdays. Styles said take the garbage out before work. Cornette asked what his work is. Styles said TNA Wrestling. Cornette told Styles to get to work finding a tag partner. -Commercial Break- -In the ring with The Beautiful People- Mike Tenay stood mid-ring and interviewed Velvet Sky and Angelina Love. Their mid-rope crotch-rubbing ring entrance is much more effective without Don West commenting about how turned on he is by it. That's a bit of mood killer for almost anyone. Tenay asked Velvet and Angelina if they're ready to make "the ultimate sacrifice" and have their head shaved if one of them loses the match. Angelina said they don't want the "makeover" to go to waste, so they want to make sure it goes to someone who needs it. They showed an image of a bald Gail Kim on the relatively tiny screen in the corner of the Impact Zone. Then came an image of a bald ODB, too. She asked why anyone would want to mess with their God-given beautiful looks. She said it's all the "disgusting, nasty, greasy male and female" fans in the audience have to live for. Velvet said they can look all they want, but none of them can ever touch the Beautiful People. Gail Kim and ODB walked out. They shoved the Beautiful People down. A brawl broke out. The BPs bailed out of the ring. ODB said, "Since you two hookers seem to have no customers tonight, how about you two come back here in 30 minutes and I guarantee you that one of you is going to be in your favorite position - flat on your back." -Backstage with AJ Styles 2- Borash was backstage when Angle walked past Styles. He stopped and asked if he's talked to Karen lately. Styles said no. Angle said, "Let's keep it that way." Styles walked into Booker T's locker room and asked him if he could be his partner. Booker T said, "Who are you? Are you someone's little brother or something? What you doing coming in here?" Okay, the idea is if Booker pretends he doesn't know who Styles is, Styles introduced himself. Booker asked if he has a pass to be there. Styles said he's the most decorated wrestler in the company. He listed all of his titles. Booker asked who he beat. -Commercial Break- -Backstage with Nash and Joe- Lauren interviewed Joe and Kevin Nash backstage. She asked him about the three-way stip at the next PPV and having to team with Angle later. She asked how that was sitting with him. Joe said they see everything coming. He said he counts down the days to Sacrifice. He said he loves competition, and loves destroying people more. He said even more he loves being champ. Nash interjected and said, "You love the money. You love the money." -Deuces Wild Qualifier; LAX vs Kaz and Eric Young- Usual Entrance by Eric Young, fireworks scared the crap out of him..(That's getting really old) Hernandez powerbombed Kaz and had him pinned, but wasn't applying any leverage. He was just sitting there casually and letting the ref count Kaz's shoulders down. Young ran in and gave Hernandez a forearm to the back. It did nothing at all to help Kaz raise his shoulders since Hernandez wasn't applying any leverage,Young got a hot-tag, but Homicide schoolboyed Young seconds later for the win. -Winners:LAX- -Match Rating:2/5- -After the Match- Homicide grabs the mic and calls Hector Guerrero to the ring as Impact takes a commercial. -Commercial Break- -Back from Break- Homicide told Hector that for years he's studied tapes of his family, especially his brother Eddie. Hector began making exaggerated facial expressions, Homicide said they want Hector to be in his corner at Sacrifice to guide them. He said he can help them. Hector enthusiastically accepted the invite. -In Jim Cornette's office- Lauren held the mic for Traci Brooks lobbying Cornette. He told her, "Traci, Traci, it doesn't take a whole lot of gravy to go all over my place." He said she's one of the people he can half-tolerate, so don't push it and he'll consider her request. (Traci's going to get her head shaved, I predict.) Matt Morgan walked in and said they both know what he's capable of, so he wants to be sure he's included in the Deuce's Wild tournament. Morgan said, "You owe me." Cornette said he wouldn't be there if it wasn't for him. Cornette said he'll have to wait until tonight. Kip James jumped Morgan from behind in Cornette's office to get revenge for the uncalled for attack in the hallway at the start of last week's show. -Before Commercial- Camera was staring at "The Beautiful People's butts, as Impact then cut to a break. -Commercial Break- -In Kevin Nash' Locker Room with AJ Styles- Styles knocked on Nash's locker room and walked in. He was analyzing Christi Hemme's dream. He said, "Sometimes a banana is just a banana, and a rubber glove is just a rubber glove." Christi left, but told Styles first, "We're going to rock your night, baby! Whoo!" Nash shook his head and said dejectedly, Styles said he wanted Nash to be his partner. He said it's big money. Nash said the big money is the World Title. Styles said Joe is the champion now. Nash began to stand up as he said, "Damn right he is." -ODB, Gail Kim vs "The Beautiful People" Angelina Love and Velvet Sky- Back and forth action with Gail mounting a bit of offense, Gail goes for a top rope type move like Eddie Guerrero used to do but Velvet made Gail, slip with Kim being in a bad situation on the ropes. Velvet throws Kim off hard as Impact takes a commercial break. -Commercial Break- Kim knocked Love out of the ring after Love broke up a pin by ODB on Sky after a Thesz Press. ODB finished off Velvet with a running power slam for the victory! -Winners: ODB, Gail Kim -Match Rating:3/5- -After the Match- Love attacked Kim afterward, but ODB made the save. Roxxi Laveaux then came out and gave Love a Voodoo Drop in center-ring. ^The drop by Roxxi must hurt, cause it sure looks painful^ -Commercial Break- -Backstage with AJ Styles 4- Borash asked James Storm, Jackie, and Robert Roode backstage. Roode was reading a paper. Storm asked if he was reading comics. Roode said "Stocks and Bonds." Storm said, "What, Barry Bonds?" Roode said money makes the world go around. Storm said a few more beers his world will start going around. Styles presented Storm with some whiskey that Storm didn't like. He said he drinks beer. Styles said it's his grandpa's couch syrup. When Storm called Karen a skank. Styles shoved him. Roode stood up and told Styles that his answer is no. He said he and Storm are in the "egotistical eight," so go bug someone else. Storm left with his beers. He saw Borash was trying to steal Style's bottle of liquor. Styles said he bought it, so he's keeping it. Styles banged his head against the lockers. He and Borash noticed someone off camera. Styles asked if he'd be his partner. Styles must have gotten a yes due to the look on his face... -Commercial Break- -AJ Styles and Super Eric vs Rock N Rave Infection- Deuces Qualifying match... Great match, AJ started out great, and mounted a good offense against Rave. AJ hit a lot of impact moves on Rave. Rave gets a tag to Hoyt who dominates AJ for a bit. Hoyt did a reverse Swing Bottom face crusher to AJ. AJ out of nowhere gets a hot tag to Eric. Eric cleans house. Later AJ is in, Rave goes to pull AJ back to him but AJ catches Rave with a Pele. AJ tags Eric who goes for a Double Death Valley Driver but its failed. Christy tries to distract AJ, but AJ says "Your not Karen". AJ runs to ropes but Christy trips AJ. Hoyt outside, Rave goes for Eric but AJ catches Rave with an Enziguri. Eric hit the Super Eric Driver for the victory! -Winners: AJ Styles, Super Eric- *Note* I laughed at how happy AJ was, this whole thing was funny but this was the match of the night! -Match Rating:5/5- -Interview with Sting- Borash interviewed Sting backstage. He said Cornette was right, this place is a looney bin. He said if you think you know anyone, you don't. He said this business takes away your ability to know who you can trust. He said it's time to find out about the egotistical eight. -Commercial Break- -A Video Package showed what the Terror Dome would be like, it sort of told me Abyss might be back at Sacrifice.- -Daizee Haze vs Cheerleader Melissa- Funny how Melissa is Raisha Sayeed.. The most boring match of the night.. Daizee got tossed like a rag doll. And in the end Melissa hit a Reverse Chicken wing powerbomb. -Winner>Cheerleader Melissa- -Match Rating:0/5- -Interview with The Freaks- Lauren interviewed Steiner, Petey, and Khan. Steiner said they may say all men are created equal, but looking at him, that's clearly not true. He said he's a genetic freak and not normal, so Joe's chances of winning are way below 25 percent in this three-way match. He said he has a 66.6 percent chance of winning because Angle can't beat him and won't even try. He did some math and came up with Joe having an 8 percent chance of winning. He got tripped up a little, but concluded he has a 141.6 percent chance of winning at Sacrifice. Lauren's facial expressions were just right in this. She was restrained, but clearly listening. Steiner asked who Lauren was for. She said Joe is nice. Steiner said she's the type of girl who likes romancing. He called Joe a fat-ass. Petey said, "Maple Leaf Muscle is who you need to look up!" -Commercial Break- -Scott Steiner, Petey Williams vs Samoa Joe, Kurt Angle- -Quick Commercial- Steiner was on offense against Joe after the break. Joe finally reached for a hot-tag with Angle, but instead of tagged him, he gave Angle the finger and then made the Tommy Dreamer Comeback where he was suddenly 100 percent and beat up Petey and Steiner at once after taking a sustained beating for five minutes. He snap powerslammed Petey. Steiner "made the save," which again consisted of hitting Joe on the ref stopping his count, even thought Joe was still covering Petey and Petey's shoulders were still down. A four-way brawl broke out. Angle clotheslined Steiner out of the ring. Joe applied his clutch sleeper on Petey. Angle hit Joe from behind to break it. He went for an Olympic Slam. Joe escaped and fired back with a running boot to Angle's face. Then he gave Petey a Muscle Buster for the win. -Winners: Joe, Angle- -Match Rating: 2/5- -After the Match- Angle attacked Joe from behind. Steiner in essence made the save with a lead pipe, but as soon as Angle bailed out, Steiner hit Joe with the pipe. Then he grabbed the World Title belt and held it in the air. -Backstage with Cornette- Borash backstage asked Cornette for the scoop. Cornette said he's about to cause some chaos that will shock the world - after the break in the ring. -Commercial Break- -Tenay and West threw to the ring where Cornette stood with the tag belts on a table. He said that is the prize that all of the entrants are fighting for. He said four tag teams have already qualified for the tournament, and four more teams will be made of the individuals he's about to bring to the ring. He said the pairings will be made at random. Cornette introduced Morgan, Kip, B.G. James, Storm, Booker T, Roode, and Sting. He counted and said that's only seven. He said there's one more to go, and it will make history... Awesome Kong.. Everyone looked shocked or in a distressful way kinda laughed, but Kong will bring the wrath upon em, just wait. -End of Impact- -My Thoughts- Great show, AJ and Eric seem like a great team, sorta thought Abyss would be one of the 8 but I guess not.. See you all next week! Views: 1,099 
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COMMENTS |
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Comment # 1
lol, glad I have people who care!
Posted by Cody on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 2
Reverse chickenwing powerbomb? It was a modified Vertebreaker, like the Hurricane/Gregory Helms used to use. Don't know where you got your move name from.
Posted by hitmanricks on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 3
Hitmanricks that is the other name for a Vertabreaker..
Posted by FoL on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 4
Reverse chickenwing drop would sound a bit better since the person is being dropped, not slammed. But that's just me. Sorry, didn't know.
Posted by hitmanricks on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 5
Cheerleader Melissa and Daize 0/5?
MCMG and CurryMan-SharkBoy 0/5?
Don't get it :S
Posted by Robert Conrey on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 6
Robert, The Machine Gun Match, was boring, along with The Cheerleader Melissa match... these matches were the most boring on the show.
Posted by Cody Roark on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 7
I prefer the name "Inverted Gory Bomb" myself
Posted by Jack Power on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 8
lol ! everithing is gatting boring 4 u m8ts..but not for me !
Posted by Ben Tenissan on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 9
Its not getting boring, its starting to get exciting
Posted by Cody on Saturday, May 03, 2008
Comment # 10
Only 2 matches "passed" in your rating. Ouch, you're tough man. I haven't seen Impact this week, so I shouldn't really make this comment, but it seems unreal to me that if you put Steiner, Angle and Joe in one match, it would not get 3/5.
Posted by El Valo on Sunday, May 04, 2008
Comment # 11
I understand where you are coming from but the main event wasn't game winning quality in my eyes.. but I see TNA in the next few weeks building really strong and will beat WWE in Ratings.
Posted by Cody on Sunday, May 04, 2008
Comment # 12
I liked MMG match vs Curry Man and Shark Boy and i think the Angle and Samoa Joe VS Scott Steiner and Petey Williams should be at least 3/5.
TNA will only beat ECW i dont think that TNA can get better ratings that RAW our Smackdown!!!
Posted by JTG on Sunday, May 04, 2008
Comment # 13
I would have to agree that the Daizee Haze vs Cheerleader Melissa was boring. If TNA is trying to hype the knockout divison as something to watch they missed badly with that match. I'll take "The Beautiful People" vs. anyone over that match.
I will admit I had no idea who this Cheerleader Melissa character was before the match, but I take her as Raisha Sayeed anyday.
Posted by john ace on Sunday, May 04, 2008
Comment # 14
I think its wierd that Raisha Sayeed/Cheerleader Melissa are the same people. Couldn't TNA get another woman to be Cheerleader Melissa. Must be a lot of stress for that woman to play 2 characters in the same night, with costume changes, makeup, etc.
Posted by hitmanricks on Monday, May 05, 2008
Comment # 15
IT WOULD BE GRAET IF BOBBY LASELY COMES TO TNA
Posted by JAY on Monday, May 05, 2008
Comment # 16
thanks for another good report
Posted by simon on Monday, May 05, 2008
Comment # 17
Cheerleader Melissa is the next mickey james
Posted by Cheerleader Melissa on Tuesday, May 06, 2008
Comment # 18
Hey JTG, RAW IS the dominant brand in sports-entertainment, then in my opinion it is TNA. Smackdown is boring for the most part even tho they have 'Taker and Rey Rey (when he gets back). And ECW just sucks in general.
Posted by X-ercist on Thursday, May 08, 2008
Comment # 19
good game for all people
Posted by eriq32 on Saturday, May 17, 2008
Comment # 20
It would have been difficult for TNA to use someone else for the Cheerleader Melissa character as it has been Melissa Anderson's since 99.
Posted by DJ44601 on Friday, May 30, 2008
Comment # 21
i want tna not sepetember monday
Posted by max on Sunday, July 20, 2008
Comment # 22
can i have tna
Posted by john cabon on Sunday, July 20, 2008
